Oh dear, Readers. It is New Year’s Eve and there is every intention of me writing my blog for you, but somebody has opened the blood orange gin and it is “slipping down very nicely”, which means there is a limited window in which to write anything meaningful. I do apologise.
Well, I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas with your loved ones, with plenty of marvellous food and drink. I had a smashing Christmas Day at dear Ebony’s house – there were a lot of visitors but I rather like them, so I enjoyed the fuss and they all let me have my usual armchair which was nice. I was even given the odd treat or two, and particularly enjoyed the sausage rolls. Eventually my family returned well into the evening and took me home. The day had started nicely, to be fair, with presents under the tree which included, wait for it, a new bottle of Fox Poo Shampoo!! How fortuitous was that?! I only said, on Christmas Eve, that I had nearly run out – well, dear Pippa came up trumps and has bought me another year’s supply. Fabulous.
So Christmas Day was pleasant, with a festive walk first thing in the morning; this involved many a cheery “Happy Christmas” to all the other dog walkers out early. I did find it strange, however, that someone was fishing at the river by 10am on Christmas morning – I can understand that the peace and solitude is preferable to the chaos of Christmas morning at home, but it did strike one as an unusual activity for this particular day of the year. I don’t like fishermen at the best of times, as you know Readers, with their nasty long rods and unnatural stillness, so I barked menacingly at him. He ignored me which I felt was rude and unfestive.
Then on Boxing Day there was another lovely walk at the river and lots of sitting around sleeping and eating. It was just perfect.
Today has been a funny old day. She went to a town far away this morning, to sit in John Lewis and gaze around at all the lovely things that we can never quite afford. The clean smell and tidiness in there is, as Regular Readers know, quite calming and much cheaper than therapy. Now, She has been given a gift voucher to spend at John Lewis by NanaAged88, as NanaAged88 is fed up with She going to the hallowed halls but never buying anything. Oh the choice, Readers. Should it be spent on Eqyptian cotton towels? 200 thread- count bed linen? A sensible shirt reduced in the Hobbs section? Or a couple of buttons on a Ralph Lauren t shirt….. it really was quite overwhelming. The decision was narrowed down to a floor lamp that was half price as it had lost its box, a radio for the kitchen or a pair of pyjamas reduced to £17. You can see the dilemma. In the end, the voucher remained intact and the only purchase was a small nail varnish, as the pyjamas were eliminated due to there being a pair in Sainsburys for £10, the radio was eliminated for being slightly too large and the lamp was eliminated for the LED bulbs being too expensive at £12 for 3. But on the plus side, we still have a voucher to spend in John Lewis!
I know, Readers.
So tonight is New Year’s Eve, and Lad has gone to a town far away – that surprised you, didn’t it! – with his friends for a couple of fizzy drinks. There was a stern lecture before he left about Staying Safe and Idiots Out Drinking and the such like. Lad yawned and said he would be ok. Lad will probably text She at 3.30am to wish her a Happy New Year, and I’m sure She is looking forward to this. Then there will be another text message sometime tomorrow, asking for a lift home.
Young Lad and He have gone to the snooker club this evening, for a fun-filled hour or two of hitting some balls round a table.
I am having a cosy night in with She (in her new Sainsbury’s pyjamas) and Gingercat. We have food, drink, candles, blankets and Netflix, and this is all we need for a Good Time. The food has been a little disappointing, actually. Someone was fixated on the thought of a Sparks Means Marks prawn linguine for this evening, but left it until mid afternoon to pop over to Sparks Means Marks. Alas, the ready meal shelves were stripped bare! Crowds of people were fighting over the last few lasagnes and four cheese raviolis – but there was no prawn linguine in sight. Oh the bitter pill of realising one is too late to the party….
And so a low-fat smoked haddock risotto from another store was purchased but it really wasn’t that great, and didn’t all get eaten. I was quite pleased to be given the container, but it was nowhere near as nice as a prawn linguine container would have been. There is some talk of a bag of mini cheddars in a few minutes, to try to raise the standard of tonight’s meal.
Sadly, Friends, I am still having a few problems with my hip and am not quite as flexible as usual. For instance, I find it a little tricky to get up the stairs to bed, and instead of racing everyone and pushing them out the way, I am clambering up much more slowly. I have also struggled a couple of times to jump on the sofa or into my armchair. The Evil Vet is going to see me on Thursday this week, to have a look and find out whether it is my hip or back that is problematic. I imagine they will weigh me again and do a lot of tutting, and She will be told I have to Lose Weight yet again. She is crossing her fingers and hoping that XRays are not involved as XRays are bldyexpensive and nobody has any money.
The Evil Vet does not take John Lewis vouchers.
I did snatch a small portion of chocolate fridge cake the other day, but don’t tell anyone. It was being transferred from one dish to another and a whole slab fell on the floor – as quick as you could say butter, cream, dark chocolate and biscuits, I hoovered up several small (ish) pieces. I am none the worse for this experience despite the ratio of dog to unsuitable ingredients.
Tonight’s cosy New Year Night In was going to involve a) writing a list of jobs for tomorrow b) a pedicure and manicure c) returning emails (long-overdue) to our Australian relatives. None of this is going to happen, now that the blood orange gin is open. Any attempt at painting one’s nails with the new nail varnish will need a lot of squinting and deep concentration, and I can’t see it happening. In fact, I think we should just hunt through the cupboards for the mini Cheddars – this seems far more sensible to me.
Well it’s been a funny old year, Friends, with a few ups and downs, but I have stayed true to myself throughout and continued to raid bins, tear the laminate off the kitchen cupboards, throw the recycling round the garden and cover the lounge carpet in potato peelings every so often. I feel it’s important to stick to what you know.
Readers, I wish you a Happy and Healthy New Year and thank you so much for still being there.
Bye for now,