I was not happy about this, Readers. Not happy at all. It all started when She shouted at me for having rolled in fox poo on the final stretch of our walk yesterday – we nearly managed four miles through country fields with me staying pristine, and in fact several people had remarked on this – but on the way home I found a nice patch and so down went my shoulder and I rolled. When we got home I had to be scrubbed, and was then told to get in my bed. Well I couldn’t! Gingercat was in in it! I stood by the side of my bed looking very sad, with the biggest, glummest brown eyes you’ve ever seen. There was no sympathy however, and I was given a push and told to bunk up with Gingercat. Look how squashed I am! Gingercat has twice the space I do. Really it was too much and I was very upset.
No, I don’t believe that this is how dear, dear Ebony or Pippa feel when I get into their beds.
It’s been a busy old week here. I spent several days with dear Ebony and I think she thoroughly enjoyed my company – we had a marvellous walk one day up to Top Top Field and got up to mischief. Ebony ran off, and at exactly the same time I found a huge pile of horse manure that had been dumped in the field, so Ebony’s Pack Leader had to try retrieving Ebony and pulling me out of the manure heap at the same time. I showed her how I felt about this, and ran back to the manure heap as soon as her back was turned. It was quite stressful for Ebony’s Pack Leader but Ebony and I had a laugh.
I also went to daycare at dear Pippa’s house and was very well-behaved, raising my head from the soft furnishings only when it was time for lunch and the cheese came out. That’s always my favourite part of the day at Pippa’s house.
Yesterday, being Saturday, I had a very long walk down by the river, over the bridge and a long way up through the field. It was very muddy and there were glorious smells all over the shop. As we went round the back of Top Field, She became a little agitated as a man appeared from the woods all on his own. Now, it is common knowledge that if a man is in Top Field on his own and without a dog, he is clearly up to No Good and so one has to Walk Quickly and Assertively and Pretend One is Talking On The Phone To The Police. Thankfully, after a pregnant pause, a large German Shepherd caught up with him and so we could stop the assertive walking and pretend talking, as it is well-known that any man appearing from the woods with a German Shepherd is no threat at all.
I ask you.
NiceDogWalkerLady with the chocolate labrador was down there yesterday, with her husband, and we stopped for a chat. NiceDogWalkerLady’s husband couldn’t remember whether I was me, or the other beagle called Barney The Oh-So Adorable Beagle – the confusion was because both Barney and my Pack Leaders have what NiceDogWalkerLady’s husband described as “silvery” hair. My Pack Leader was not impressed with this choice of language and flared her nostrils. Clearly NiceDogWalkerLady’s husband doesn’t know much about sophisticated highlights.
And so to today – and another long, glorious walk through autumnal fields. We bumped into my friend Buddy the Bouncy Labrador, who was extremely bouncy and in fact soaking wet as he had been bouncing in the river. I have to say that Buddy looked remarkably well as he has been poorly recently and had a big operation, and indeed is on treatment called chemotherapy – well, there were no signs of side effects, I can tell you! Buddy was as full of beans as ever.
On the home front, She went to the cinema with her good friend Loadsakids on Friday night to see a film that turned out to be quite scary. There was a lot of jumping in seats and bad language, but somehow this is all very enjoyable it seems, and counts as a good time.
Lad went to a town far away with his friends on Friday night to let off steam, which was only right as Lad has been working very hard for yet more exams. Lad arrived back home in the small hours of the morning and decided this was just the time to cook a small meal. I quite agree with him. Young Lad has done a LITTLE homework today and then endured a very cold football match. I’m glad they didn’t take me as it was on astroturf this time, and there is no fun whatsoever in walking round artificial grass for an hour and a half.
Now here’s a strange thing. While Lad was revising yesterday, he suddenly shouted out “what does libido mean – is it sex drive?” and it seems that this is an unusual thing to ask one’s mother. It turned out that Lad was revising A Level Biology, so in actual fact it was a perfectly acceptable question to shout out and did not need all the snorting.
It is bitterly cold tonight, Friends. I know my Readers in Australia will find this hard to believe as they are yet again in the middle of a heatwave, but tonight is the coldest night of the year so far. One of my towels has been draped across the car windscreen as someone can’t be bothered to scrape ice off at 7am tomorrow morning. To be honest, I can’t wait to get to bed tonight as I’m very tired from all the walking, and the sooner we all hunker down beneath warm duvets, the better. Food has been appropriately warming today, with leek and potato soup for lunch and lasagne for dinner. This is probably the last home-made meal that Lad and Young Lad will get for the rest of the week, due to Working Full Time.
Keep warm, Friends.
See you soon,