Bathroom Bin

bathrrom binIt’s been a while since my last blog, Readers, and for this I do apologise.  My family have been very busy with working full time and going to school etc, and there has been little time for me.  Nothing changes.

The half term holiday seems like a lifetime ago, and this week I have been to dear, dear Pippa and Ebony’s houses for daycare each day.  We’ve had a marvellous time with plenty of long walks, and lots of long sleeps in the armchair as well.  To be honest it’s quite a wrench when I have to go home.  Obviously, as I’ve been chez Pippa and Ebony for the week, I have been very well-behaved and not up to much mischief at all.  However, one morning I was very quick and before Ebony’s Pack Leader had time to collect me I bolted upstairs and emptied the bathroom bin.  There were lots of disgusting things in  there, and I ate them.  Anything I didn’t eat I just threw round the floor.  Really I made a splendid mess, and all this in the space of ten minutes after She leaving for work and Ebony’s Pack Leader picking me up.

Other than the normal throw-the-recycling-round-the-garden activity, I’ve been pretty good even if I say so myself.

Today I went for a VERY long walk along the river, over the bridge and right up into Top Top Top Field!  Yes, we haven’t been there for a while and it was incredibly muddy as there have been lots of BMX bikes riding around and it’s a bit of a mess.   Top Top Top Field itself was lovely – very grassy and lush – and there was something in there that was totally disgusting that I ate.  She got very cross with me as I wouldn’t keep up and actually wandered off in the opposite direction, following the smell of the disgusting something.   Now, Readers, I’m not going to divulge what the disgusting something was but all I will say is that I am cracking the most horrific smells tonight.  Horrific. There are two candles lit already.

I was forced to walk for four miles today, and I am cream crackered tonight.  She says my waistline is still too large and this annoys me intensely – people in glass houses and all that.

Lad has been working very hard for some more exams.  It has felt like a current state of affairs in this house for the past ten years or so it seems, and I do feel sorry for Lad.  There are revision cards and books all over the shop and they are in no apparent order whatsoever but Lad knows what he is doing.  I don’t think we should underestimate him.  Yes it is a little untidy but so what?  I feel it is unnecessary to constantly ask him to put the bldythings in onebldyplace.

Alas due to Lad’s long hours of study, his bedroom has paid a hefty price.  Normally it is just about possible to open the door enough to whip round with the hoover but today this proved too tricky as there was very little carpet visible for hoovering.  So instead She had to content herself with collecting mugs, cups, plates and uneaten breakfast from the past week and called that ‘cleaning’.

Young Lad, too, has been busy.  This morning he was forced to empty the dishwasher BEFORE going on the Xbox – it’s Sunday morning for the love of God! – and then after the Xbox he had to climb upstairs in order to shower and dress.  At the top of the stairs Young Lad tried to tell She something but had to go and sit down as he was ‘out of breath.’ She was incredibly unsympathetic and snapped something about only walkedupthebldystairs so poor Young Lad had to sit and get his breath back on his own.  Later this morning, Young Lad wanted to go to Detention Friend’s house but was mulling over the effort involved in walking up the road.  I think, Friends, that Young Lad was angling for a lift to the top of the road but clearly that wasn’t going to happen.  So poor Young Lad had to walk all the way to the top of the road, AND back again four hours later!  Really this is too much.

While I had a nice sleep this afternoon and Lad quietly studied, She went into town and met her good friend Loadsakids for coffee.  Loadsakids and She talked about all the usual things – bldy kids, bldy dogs- and made each other laugh.  I fail to see what is so amusing.   Loadsakids needed to warm up after a morning at football – however in our house, we had no match as the pitch couldn’t be marked out due to the damage caused by the fireworks and bonfire last week.  Thus Young Lad and Detention Friend had no physical activity today and instead spent four hours on the Xbox.  Young Lad has been spoken to rather firmly tonight.

Well there are some lovely smells coming from the kitchen – not from me, it has to be said as I’ve just let off another shocker – as there is a roast chicken, potatoes stuffing and all the bits in the oven.  It was felt that Lad has been working so hard and needs really good sustenance on a Sunday evening so a proper roast was the way to go – obviously Young Lad has not worked very hard but he has walked up and down the road plus up and down the stairs a few times.  It really does smell lovely, and I’m looking forward to the dishwasher.

Tomorrow I’m off to dear Pippa’s for the day, and the rest of the week will  be spent with Ebony.  She says she hopes my intestines have settled down a little by tomorrow morning as it’s ’embarrassing’ sending me to other people’s houses smelling like a drain.  It’s so rude and unnecessary, Readers.

Have a good week, Friends.

Bye for now,

Russell

Author: boredbeagle

Slightly stocky beagle who lives with a family. This is She, He, Lad and Young Lad. And Gingercat. Generally doesn't get enough attention and so writes this blog to let everyone know what his life is like. You need to start from page one (First Attempt).. Go on, it's worth the effort.

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