Tinned Salmon

Skinless--Boneless-Wild-Pacific-Red-Salmon-Large_645x390 What did I tell you?  I made it very clear that with the new working full-time regime, there would be very little scope for my blog to be written.  I was right, Readers.  Myself, Gingercat, Lad and Young Lad have been completely neglected over the last week, much as I predicted.

Anyway, I’ve had to take my entertainment where I can find it.  Do you remember, Friends, that the oven packed up last weekend, only 48 hours after it had been cleaned?  A shiny new oven has now been installed and might stay clean for a week or two.  It was clearly a week for things packing up, however, as She fancied a nice tin of John West red salmon (it’s very expensive, by the way!) on her salad one evening.  Sadly the tin didn’t have one of those pull ring things, so in an irritated manner the tub containing the kitchen utensils was hunted through to find a tin-opener.  The tin-opener broke as soon as She started opening the tin of salmon.

The language, Readers!  There were about three puncture marks in the tin, which meant there was no way of getting the salmon out of it.   Some jabbing with a serrated knife was tried, which achieved little and was frankly dangerous, and eventually we had to fall back on our usual tactic.  Yes indeed, the neighbours .  Lovelyneighbourontheright had one of those sturdy electric tin openers, so this was passed over the fence with a quick pause for conversation.  When She returned to the kitchen with the sturdy electric tin-opener, there was no sign of the tin of salmon.  After some hunting around it was discovered in my bed.  I have no idea how it got there.

Now I had not managed to remove the salmon from the tin any more than She had, but there was a possibility, and I say only a possibility, that the tin had been in my mouth from its journey from the working surface to my bed.  I would imagine this thought would have been enough for most of you to chuck the tin of salmon in the bin – but oh no.  Red salmon costs a fortune!!  And we’d gone to all the effort of borrowing the sturdy electric tin opener from Lovelyneighbourontheright!  So there was no way that tin was going anywhere but into the tin opener (She did give it a wipe round first) and the red salmon was duly enjoyed on the salad.

I know, it’s disgusting. 

The weekend was very busy here, what with Lad and his new job in Designer Retail.  Of course, Friday night being Friday night, there was a party in a town far away and this went on very late, so poor Lad had no choice but to stay in the town far away and come back on a morning train ready to start his shift at midday.  And what do you think – it was a SEVEN hour shift!!  Yes, Lad did not finish until 7pm and had to be picked up as he could barely stand.   It really is too much.  Then Lad had to go to work again the next day – Sunday is meant to be a day of rest!  No wonder his feet ache.  

Another disadvantage to Lad having a Proper Job is that he is no longer here to do menial tasks in the garden.   I found this quite funny actually, as it meant She had to spend all weekend raking up the leaves/rotten apples/rotten pears and cutting the grass, not to mention cutting back the raspberry canes and pulling out a load of nettles.  You see, this wasn’t thought through when Lad was forced to get a proper job, was it?!  Oh no.  You may be wondering why Young Lad wasn’t coerced into helping, but Young Lad felt a bit “under the weather” and was having a lie down.  All day.

So the weekend was spent gardening, moaning, moving some furniture around, moaning, washing and ironing, moaning, and driving Lad to and from work, moaning.  Young Lad had rallied enough on Sunday to go to football and run around in the fresh air for an hour and a half.  I quite enjoyed this as I went too, and had a lovely walk around the playing fields.

When we got home from football, Young Lad sat down to do his homework and then realised that one of the tasks was to practise piping icing, for Food Technology. (Yes, Food Tech starts again next week!!  I can’t wait!!)  So late in the day on Sunday, Young Lad and She had to knock up some cakes and make icing, which then had to be squeezed through a nozzle at the end of a bag thing, to make a pretty pattern.  It did not make a pretty pattern but it did make a horrific mess and we will be scraping dried up red icing off the working surface for days to come.  Some dropped down the front of the washing machine, as always seems to happen in our kitchen, so I cleaned it up. 

Really, I had quite a chuckle at the weekend.  Once She had spent hours clearing up the garden and cutting the grass, I waited half an hour and then pulled a Pringles tube out of the recycling sack.  I then shredded this into tiny bits and spat it all over the lawn.  Pleased with the effect, I did the same with a Whiskas Cat Food pouch.  As the wind had strengthened by mid-afternoon, all the leaves and remaining rotten apples on the tree fell off so by tea-time it looked like nothing had been done in the garden whatsoever.  You have to laugh.

Well, we’re only two days into the new working week and I have been to dear, dear Ebony’s house both days.  This has been wonderful.  Ebony found some fox poo on our walk today and rolled in it – I was about to join in as you know I am a little partial to it – but Ebony’s Pack Leader shouted at me in a stern voice!  I was so shocked I stood quite still and did not roll in the fox poo.  Ebony carried on rolling in it and took no notice of her Pack Leader shouting.  I was very good.

Tomorrow I’m off to dear Pippa’s house – it’s quite a while since I’ve been there and I feel we have a lot of catching up to do.  It will be much nicer than being at home, that’s for sure.  Tomorrow is also Wednesday which of course means we are on a short bldy window of time to get home from work and out for football training – with a bit of luck I might go to football again and walk around the pitch.  There may well be remnants of discarded packed lunches thrown by school children on their way home – I do hope so.

Good Lord I’m tired tonight!

See you soon,


Author: boredbeagle

Slightly stocky beagle who lives with a family. This is She, He, Lad and Young Lad. And Gingercat. Generally doesn't get enough attention and so writes this blog to let everyone know what his life is like. You need to start from page one (First Attempt).. Go on, it's worth the effort.

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