You have no idea how tiring my life is. It’s no wonder that I’m nodding off by 7pm tonight – I simply can’t keep my eyes open! Why am I so exhausted? I hear you ask. Well. There is a ripped-up yogurt pot on the floor in here, an empty crisp packet and a cat food pouch under the dining room table, I’ve emptied the bathroom bin again and pre-rinsed everything in the dishwasher. All this, on top of a day at dear Ebony’s house! These activities take it out of a chap; you shouldn’t underestimate the energy used in ripping up a yogurt pot.
Well, I had a lovely day at dear, dear Pippa’s house yesterday – I hadn’t seen her for ages and it was so lovely to catch up. I made myself thoroughly at home by sleeping on the furniture, and when She came to collect me after work, I was sitting on Pippa’s Pack Leader Male’s knee. I’m not one to curl up discreetly in a corner. She was extremely late, I have to say, as has been the case every day this week – do you know, I wasn’t collected until after 5.30pm? This is an hour and a half AFTER my dinner time and I was absolutely starving, I can tell you. I feel this is very neglectful and people really should leave work earlier to tend to their families and responsibilities.
Needless to say I raced through the front door, barking hysterically to make it perfectly clear that my dinner was extremely overdue. Young Lad was here with Detention Friend, and I have to admit to being very rude to Detention Friend who wanted to make a fuss of me. I ignored him completely in my sprint to the kitchen- I’m afraid a pat on the head from Detention Friend comes very much second place to eating. Not one to be disheartened, Detention Friend came to the kitchen and fed me, thus killing two birds with one stone. I like Detention Friend.
Of course it was Wednesday so it was very shoddy on the parenting/healthy food front. Lad had cooked chips for Young Lad and Detention Friend – they had them with a blob of Hellmann’s mayonnaise. This hardly constitutes a proper meal. I mean I would have eaten it quite happily, obviously, but I think it’s appalling that Lad and Young Lad’s dietary needs are neglected like this.
Anyway, by the time She brought me home there was a whole ten minutes to spare before leaving for football training, so there was a lot of stomping round the kitchen and moaning at Lad for not putting stuff in the dishwasher. He had just done the cooking for heaven’s sake! Too much is expected of him. Peace was restored once She, Young Lad and Detention Friend left for football although it was a bit feisty at the last minute as Young Lad couldn’t find his shinpads. Again.
I had a lovely sleep while they were all out. It was just Lad and I here, and it was so peaceful. These moments are rare.
Readers, I have some very upsetting news. There I was, expecting something halfway decent from Young Lad’s Food Technology lesson to come home today, when I was sorely disappointed. Food Tech is over for this year!! It has been replaced by Sewing Tech. What the actual heck? Instead of macaroni cheese or rock cakes, Young Lad is making a pencil case. I have never heard of anything so ridiculous – how often is he going to need to make a pencil case in life? Who makes up this curriculum?! Dear God. Of course She breathed a sigh of relief at no more late night panic buying of cornflour in Tesco Express.
I’ve heard rumours that Lad and Young Lad break up from school tomorrow for February half term. I think this means that there will not be any hideous alarm clocks going off at silly o’clock for a week, and I for one am very glad of this. Gingercat and I are by no means ready to get up for the day at 6am, so it will be heavenly to be able to sleep in. Of course, I will need a comfort break at dawn and will need to wake She up to facilitate this, but then I can go back to sleep for as long as I want. Marvellous. This is how life should be, Friends.
I sincerely hope some effort is made in the garden over February half term. Nothing has been done out there since early November, and it looks like nothing on earth. It’s very poor that I’m expected to wander round such a hovel on my comfort breaks, and a little effort with cutting back some bushes and tidying up wouldn’t go amiss. The two Christmas trees are still out there in their holders and there is LOADS of recycling ripped up under the bushes where I have taken it. You would think somebody could clear up after me.
Well, I’m so tired out from my two walks with Ebony and having to move from chair to chair to sleep, that I haven’t the strength to write any more tonight, Readers. I do apologise.
Bye for now,