Jolly Expensive

91G0J+K4BqL._SY450_ These are delicious if over-priced American sweets.  I know this because I have eaten several today and spat the wrappers on the floor. They are indeed VERY hard candy, just as it says on the packet, and I can tell you it took me a while to chew my way through them.

Lad is very annoyed that I have eaten some of his Jolly Ranchers.  They were bought as a bldyexpensive treat for Lad and were not intended for me. Lad should know better than leaving them lying around in his bedroom then, shouldn’t he.

I’ve had a smashing couple of days, Friends!  I have been left at home for two whole days, with hours and hours of entertainment to find.  Yesterday, Lovelyneighbourontheright came round to let me out for a comfort break, and she reported that I had been very well-behaved all day.  This is because when Lovelyneighbourontheright came round, I was sitting nicely in my armchair giving the impression I had been there all day.

I hadn’t.

I had in fact opened a couple of cupboards in the kitchen and dragged out the carrier bags all over the floor. Behind them I found an old collar, my hairbrush  (never used) and a comb.  I threw these on the floor on top of the carrier bags.  Bingo!  On the next shelf up I found a box of mini-breadsticks, unopened.  To be honest I was surprised to find these as normally Lad has emptied the cupboard of any snacks and there is NOTHING to eat in this house as you know – but breadsticks there were! Off I ran, into the lounge where I ripped the box open and ate the lot. It was disappointing that they were mini breadsticks and not full size, but there you go.  It gave me something to do, and meant there was plenty of mess round the floor for Young Lad to tidy up when he got home from school.

Today I was left home alone again.  I spent the morning moving from one bed to the next, thoroughly messing them up and making myself comfortable.  It was while having a look round Lad’s hideously messy bedroom that I found the bag of Jolly Ranchers, and also a half empty bowl of Crunchy Nut cornflakes.   Readers, have you ever tried Crunchy Nut cornflakes?!!  Oh my word they are divine.  No wonder we never have frivolous cereals like this in the house usually – muesli really is no fun – and again, Lad had been bought them as a treat.  I enjoyed this treat as much as the Jolly Rip-offs, and cleaned out the bowl.

Back downstairs I found the Kong that Young Lad had left for me when he went off to school this morning – it was rather unexcitingly filled with cold mashed potato that I know for a fact had been in the fridge for four days.  It was a little stale if I’m honest.  I ate it though.  Nobody has bothered to pick up the Kong from the lounge floor since they got home tonight, and the ripped-up breadstick packet is still under the table.  It looks charming in here as you can imagine.

I added to the air of squalor in our home, by dumping one of She’s walking boots on the sofa this afternoon.  I was bored, and needed something to do.  I was moaned at when She came home from work and found a walking boot on the upholstery but I don’t really care.

Lovelyneighbourontheright was called upon yet again today, to let  me out for a comfort break.  However, this time I was taken out for a lovely walk, which turned into a run.  I don’t really do running but I pride myself on my  manners so I didn’t complain and just trotted along very briefly.   It was a beautiful day and I was in a simply marvellous mood, which was partly due to the company of Lovelyneighbourontheright and partly due to a huge sugar rush.

Now, it was a right bldyrush tonight as usual as there is a very tight window between arriving home from work and getting Young Lad out to football training.  Things were even tighter than normal tonight, Friends, as Young Lad hadn’t arrived home from school by 5pm!!  I really was becoming most worried for him.  Finally, Young Lad and his friend Detention Friend turned up, and when asked why they were so late Young Lad said they had accidentally missed two buses, while Detention Friend said they had been over the park.  The jury is out Readers, on whose version was the most truthful.  Thankfully, by a whisker, Young Lad and Detention Friend made it to football training only two minutes late, though they did have to put a shift in running across the astroturf.

You’ll be relieved to know that Young Lad had managed to grab some food while ‘waiting for two buses’ as Detention Friend knows the man who works in the chip shop and managed to get extra big portions for them both.  Note that they didn’t bring me any – this is very disappointing selfishness.  In fact I completely snubbed Detention Friend tonight when he tried to make a fuss of me, and hopefully he’s got the message.  No chips indeed.

Tomorrow I’m going to dear, dear Ebony’s for daycare and am really looking forward to it.  Whilst it has been hilariously funny having the house to myself and going through cupboards, and rather lovely seeing Lovelyneighbourontheright, I have missed the company of Ebony and her Pack Leaders.  I have especially missed Ebony’s bed and I think it’s time for her to share it with me again.

Oh I’ve just remembered, I need to make another correction from my previous blog.  I insinuated that it was rather surprising to find the Staffordshire Bull Terrier voted number 1 most popular dog breed – this upset my good friend Mollie the Staffie down by the river, and I need to rephrase my thoughts.  On reflection, it is surprising that Beagles came (well) below the Staffie in popularity but no surprise whatosever that the beautiful Staffie was number one.  Hope that’s ok, Mollie.

My book sales are just shy of 200 copies, Friends.  I can’t thank you enough and will be sending another direct debit to The Important Place in London very soon.

Bye for now,

Russell

 

Author: boredbeagle

Slightly stocky beagle who lives with a family. This is She, He, Lad and Young Lad. And Gingercat. Generally doesn't get enough attention and so writes this blog to let everyone know what his life is like. You need to start from page one (First Attempt).. Go on, it's worth the effort.

3 thoughts on “Jolly Expensive”

  1. I must tell you Russell about my antics earlier this week. My pack leader was preparing dinner, steak, mushrooms and chips no less, when a marvellous opportunity presented itself. She turned to the fridge for the slightest of moments and I took my chance, just within reach set back on the worktop was a rump steak, freshly opened and ready to scoff. I can tell you Russell it was wonderful, luckily I think she was in shock to chastise me. I was made to suffer later, no treats for a whole day afterwards. Was worth it though.

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