This is a picture of me smiling. One of her colleagues asked recently whether I ever smile, which I thought was quite rude, but there you go. As you can see, I am clearly smiling in this picture and this has nothing to do with gravitational pull exerting force on my face and pulling it into a smiley expression. I frequently lie upside down like this of an evening, smiling. To be honest, I don’t have a lot to smile about, which you will know if you’ve been reading the blog for any length of time.
Today has been a case in point. Lovelyneighbourontheright had to go away for the day, so we have had their Cockapoo puppy here all day. It has annoyed me. Admittedly it has stopped jumping on my head and trying to play with me, but still it follows me around like a lost soul, picking up things that don’t belong to it such as flip-flops and socks. So I haven’t had much to smile about today. I’ve had two walks and plenty of company so I suppose I shouldn’t moan, but I will. Lad has worked incredibly hard today, from 10.30am until 6pm on revision. This is a very good effort, and means he deserves to shout and scream for four hours on the Xbox tonight. Poor Lad. Much of this gargantuan effort is due to them being Out All Day tomorrow, which means Lad will get no work done at all. This is selfish of them. There is some large family gathering for a nice lunch in a place far away, and I’m rather annoyed not to be going as the Australian Relatives are going to be there, and I got on very well with them last time. The venue is “not dog friendly,” plus the inevitable two hours of heavy traffic on the M25 each way will be unpleasant. I’m being farmed out to people yet again for the day. Thankfully Ebony’s Pack Leader has said I can go there – really, I don’t know why I bother coming home between visits.
It is very peaceful here at the moment. Lad has gone to have a shower after his efforts, and Young Lad has fallen asleep on his bed. This is due to a heavy workload today. Young Lad not only put away three huge bags of food shopping, all in the right place for once, but he has also emptied the airing cupboard!! Yes, he sorted everyone’s clothes into piles and placed them on everyone’s beds, even managing to fold up the towels and attempt to fold up the sheets. This last bit didn’t work quite as well, but he has short arms. But really, quite a supreme effort from Young Lad, and when you consider he has also completed three pieces of homework, you can see why he’s needed to take a nap. One of these homework tasks was a Science spelling test. Now, In Science Young Lad has been learning about reproduction, and the spelling test on was words to do with this. A computerised American voice would say a word, such as FERTILISATION, and then Young Lad had to type the correct spelling into the laptop. Readers, just stop for a moment and think which kinds of words are generally used in the Reproduction topic. How I was meant to get any sleep this afternoon, with the laptop shouting out PENIS! or VAGINA! I really don’t know. There must be better ways of doing this task. TESTES!
But right now it is wonderfully quiet. The patio doors are open and there is much birdsong from the trees. A family of blue tits has been frequenting the bird table lately, which is all very well but they are rather small, and don’t knock the bread and stuff all over the shop, like the stupid collared doves do. I like it when it’s quiet like this, and God Knows it doesn’t happen often. Poor He has been at work since silly o’clock this morning, and won’t be home till late. He will be very tired, especially as He had a late night last night. In fact, Readers, we all did. This was due to yet more shoddy parenting and selfishness. He had a party to attend in a town far away, so He wasn’t here. Then She went out with some friends, to socialise, so She wasn’t here. Poor Young Lad was left on his own ALL EVENING in the lounge, to lie on the sofa and watch TV. Yes he enjoys this, but that’s not the point. I did my best to look after him, but was unable to stay awake. Lad was theoretically in charge, but as Lad was in the other room screaming at the Xbox for four hours, this is debatable. To be fair, Lad did wander into the lounge on an hourly basis (roughly) to check that we were all still alive, but this is hardly good parenting. And to leave a huge bag of Wispa bites, a tube of Pringles and some sugar-free cloudy lemonade is no recompense for proper adult supervision. It’s very poor.
I had a nice time at dear Pippa’s house yesterday, while everyone was at work/school. Pippa was extremely pleased to see me, and I showed a lot of interest in her Pack Leader’s cheese sandwich at lunchtime. Now you might think I’d had enough cheese the other day to last me a lifetime, but I barely remember that a day or two later. Readers, I pushed my luck a little today, and started barking for my dinner at 1.15pm. As you know, my dinner time is 4pm, but I thought I’d give it a go today and see how quickly they caved in. It took twenty minutes of whining and silly barks, for them to cave in. I had half my dinner just after 1.30pm. Then I repeated the whining and barking at 3pm and had the other half. Then we went for a long walk, and I asked for my dinner at 4.30pm and had the other half. I think I did quite well this afternoon and they are rubbish at maths.
Well, it’s time for their dinner which tonight is yet another frozen processed affair of fish fingers and chips. They did have lots of salad for lunch, so it is deemed appropriate to eat rubbish for dinner. I’m looking forward to this evening as it’s a cuddle on the sofa type night, with She and Young Lad, as they watch the new season of Chicago PD (yep, another one). That’s if Young Lad ever wakes up from his nap – I feel he has overdone things today. I have, too.
Time for a kip.
See you soon,