Good Lord, I’ve been in a mood today. You wouldn’t believe how many people and dogs have got on my nerves, and I’ve had to let them know. There have been far too many people walking down the road outside my house, which has necessitated bad-tempered barking at them from the sofa or the study. Sometimes it has been the same people, going down the road, then back up again! What’s the matter with them? I wish they wouldn’t walk past my house – they’re quite capable of going a long way round to wherever they’re going. Then, when I went for my morning walk, a very geriatric black labrador crawled past me and I decided to have a go at him and his equally elderly Pack Leader. Well, the elderly Pack Leader had a walking stick, and you know I don’t like those.
What probably didn’t help, was that this morning a New Tactic was tried, in terms of looking after Lovelyneighbourontheright’s cockapoo. Why yes! Take us both out for a walk at the same time! Top idea. It wasn’t. Next door’s cockapoo was on the lead and kept winding itself round everyone’s legs, including mine. I was off the lead and kept running off to look for food. Trying to coordinate a very bouncy cockapoo and stop it strangling itself, whilst watching where I’d run off to, proved Taxing. Then we both had a comfort break at separate times, which caused difficulties, too. (It can’t be that hard to hold two leads, and root around for the little black bags at the same time.) So we were all exhausted by the time we got home, and in fact the only thing that cheered me up was a Very Nice Lady by the river, stopping to tell me that she reads my blog and loves it. Her words were, “is this the Russell who writes a blog?” How wonderful to have some recognition and praise for once.
But let’s go back a little. There has been no blog for three nights, which is a Poor Show. Friday night was the normal Slovenly Pizza night except that Lad hadn’t returned home from school, so a text message was sent to enquire where he bldywas. It turned out that Lad, and some other Lads, were struggling to finish their bldy Art exam by the end of the school day, and so had to stay there until they had done so, regardless of the time. Then when Lad finally tried to leave the school, everywhere was locked up and he couldn’t find an exit for quite a while. Then Lad walked to the bus station, in time to see the bus just departing and it was a thirty minute wait for the next one. Poor Lad. Pity was taken on him, and although the pizza was freshly out the oven, it was sacrificed in favour of a fifty bldy minute round trip to collect poor Lad. This was a pleasant way to spend a Friday evening after work. Lad talked incessantly all the way home, which added to the pleasantness of it all. During this, I was asleep on the sofa with Young Lad and He, having a lovely evening. I had been at dear Ebony’s house for the day, and had been caught in a downpour in the afternoon, so needed to dry off and sleep.
Poor He had to go into work at a ridiculous hour again yesterday morning, whilst Lad had a lie-in to recover from his difficult time the day before. It was Lovelydor down the road’s birthday, yesterday, so She took her out to lunch to Costalotta. Now, I know what you’re thinking – last of the big spenders – but in fact Lovelydor had requested such. They had a very nice time and I understand the paninis and Sicilian lemon muffins are pretty good. Notice they didn’t bring any home for me. I’d love a Sicilian lemon muffin.
Now look, while we’re on the subject of ‘requests’, I need a little word with you, Readers, about Sicknote. I have been made aware of concerns that this is not a nice name to give someone, and want to reassure you that it wasn’t my idea. Sicknote did in fact, choose her own name for my blog, and is pretty much the only person to have done so, which makes her special. So quit the “oh what an awful name to give someone,” admonishments. Sicknote is quite happy with Sicknote and so am I.
Told you I’m in a mood today.
On my afternoon walk yesterday, we charged round Top Field to “When You Hear the People Sing” from Les Miserables. It’s quite a good marchy rhythm; you should try it. However, further down Top Field was a man standing on his own, with no sign of a dog. I don’t like people loitering, as you know, and even She was having second thoughts about walking right down there, in case he was up to no good. We plucked up our courage, and She held the whistle tightly so that She could whistle him into submission if he attacked us. Anyway, it was all ok as he was simply waiting for his German Shepherd that had run off. This man had the patience of a saint, as we could still him him calling for his dog forty minutes later. On the way back, Readers, I heard her sniggering, “look at that, the sublime to the ridiculous.” I thought this was rude, until I noticed a Great Dane and Chihuahua walking side by side. It was an unusual sight, I have to agree.
Young Lad has had a labour-intensive weekend. Well. Compared to his normal weekends. When Showmybldyhomework was looked at on the computer, it was discovered that there were SEVEN, yes SEVEN, items on the list. This is tiring just to think about. Poor Young Lad. He has been stoic and managed about four of them. He needed a break this afternoon, so went to the pub with He to watch Wet Sham lose badly.
There was some Drama here again this morning – oh, there’s always some crisis going on, I’ve told you this, and it gets on my nerves – but I thought to myself, what can I do to help? So I climbed over where the drama was happening, and emptied the bin in the downstairs toilet (it contained all Lad’s snack wrappings from last night on the Xbox), and then I climbed into a chair near where the drama was happening, and kicked cushions onto the floor. I’m sure this was helpful but nobody thanked me.
There has been a big food shop today, and all the pasta/macaroni and rice has been re-stocked, along with the Paxo. I’ll let you know how well that goes, Readers.
See you soon,