Lost

lost-clipart-1 Readers, I barely have the strength to write this tonight.  Not content with the three mile march round the fields this morning, She took me out again this afternoon, and decided to pop something through Pippa’s Pack Leader’s door on the way back.  Sadly, it proved rather challenging finding Pippa’s house, even though we have been there hundreds of times, but it seems approaching it from a slightly different angle (ie the river) is a step too far. It took half an hour of wandering round a housing estate, pretending we knew where we were going, before we found it.  Honestly, it beggars belief, Friends.  This is supposed to be a responsible dog owner.  I am beyond exhausted now, and fit only for my armchair.  Frankly I’m amazed the problematic pelvic floor weakness held up on this epic walk, though it was a close run thing by the time we got home.  Serves her right.

Dear me.  Apart from this, it’s been a fairly nice day.  I emptied the bin in the downstairs toilet again, which had more of Lad’s nutritious snacks packaging in it. I wasn’t keen on going for a walk this morning, having had two every day for the past fortnight, but cheered up when I bumped into a Pug/Terrier cross thing called Rodney.  He was very playful, which I’m not, but Rodney didn’t take no for an answer and kept chasing me.  There seemed to be a lot of laughing about his name; is Rodney really an unusual name for a dog?  I don’t see what’s so funny. It seemed rude to me. Anyway, I fancied a slower stroll than usual today – there was so much to sniff and look at, so I ended up being a long way behind all the time.  This was annoying, judging by the amount of shouting and moaning at me.  Eventually I was put on the lead so that I would bldy hurry up. Up in Top Field there was a cracking fresh pile of fox poo – it must have been produced very recently – and I was millimetres away from sliding in it, Friends.  I had forgotten that I was on the lead, though, and was yanked away in the nick of time.  This irritated me intensely.   Back down by the river, guess what flew over the top of us?  None other than the Bastard Swans.  Unbelievable.  As if it’s not bad enough that they swim menacingly up and down the river, eyeballing every poor creature walking past, they can also fly above us.  Do they do this quietly and unobtrusively? Oh no, they announce their presence with loud honking and squawking.  What a racket.  They frightened the life out of me.  Hate them.

Lad and Young Lad have spent yet another two days indoors.  They now look like vampires due to lack of exposure to the sun/Vitamin D.  To be fair, Young Lad did come out for one of my walks yesterday (the shorter one, obviously)  and has appeared in the garden for ten minutes to kick a ball around, but that’s it.  Lad has worked very hard, even though he feels 9.30 am is FAR too early to get up, and TOTALLY UNREASONABLE.  Young Lad accidentally forgot that he does, in fact, have some homework to do, having spent the last ten days denying this.  He was pinned to the table today for over an hour today to Bldy Well Get On With It.  He has had to consider the events leading up to the death of Thomas Becket. This is something to do with Henry II, the Pope and a small disagreement .  Well done, Young Lad. Young Lad also announced that his school have sent an email saying they are having another week off, but of course nobody believes him.  Young Lad would quite like another week of hanging round the house and forgetting to get dressed of a day.

Yesterday She met up with an old friend from the West Country.  Now this friend is a HUGE fan of my blog, and would LOVE to have met me.  But would She take me to Barstucks?  No She wouldn’t.  By all accounts I would have been a bldypain trying to hoover up crumbs of muffin from the floor, and they wouldn’t have been able to chat properly.  Well, Friends, it might be nice to give me the benefit of the ruddy doubt occasionally!  Hurtful.  Doubtless they had a lovely time.

Readers, I don’t know how Young Lad is going to cope next week when they go back to school.  Yesterday he said he only wanted to wear his dressing gown in the morning, not his onesie, as onesies “are a lot of effort” to put on.   I do see his point.  And the other day, when he forgot to get dressed all day, he sighed at dinner time and said, “where on earth has today gone?”  I fear the genteel pace at which he has lived for the last ten days is going to be in stark contrast to the new term at school.  Oh dear.  

The dishwasher- loading was such a disappointment tonight, Readers.  Seemingly, the macaroni cheese was delicious this evening, which makes a change as it normally dries out to mustardy stodge.  But with a more generous proportion of cheese sauce, every last morsel was eaten and the plates were scraped clean.  This is selfish. I had to run off with Gingercat’s half- full food bowl instead. I needed something to settle my nerves, as it has been a little stressful at times today.  New window-cleaners came round this morning – two of them!  I’m used to the same chap that’s been doing it for donkey’s years. He is quiet and doesn’t alarm me.  But recently he fell off a ladder – stop sniggering – and now two men do his window-cleaning round.  They not only put ladders up against my windows, but they CHAT, SING and sometimes have music on.  This was too much for me, and I went berserk.  It was very upsetting.  No sooner had they gone, than the doorbell went again!  More barking needed – but praise the Lord, it was my food delivery. 

Well, Readers, time to settle down for a sleep.  Young Lad is asking, from the sofa, when the chocolate cake in the oven is likely to be ready.  I’m interested in this, too.  Though I barely have the strength to raise my head, after getting lost tonight.  Ridiculous.

Bye for now,

Russell

Author: boredbeagle

Slightly stocky beagle who lives with a family. This is She, He, Lad and Young Lad. And Gingercat. Generally doesn't get enough attention and so writes this blog to let everyone know what his life is like. You need to start from page one (First Attempt).. Go on, it's worth the effort.

One thought on “Lost”

  1. Darling Russell yes it was a little disappointing that we couldn’t manage to meet up this time but never mind. There will be a chance soon, and as you say it was fantastic to see your pack leader after rather a long time. May I also point out that Young Lad isnt the only one who wears a onesie. You yourself wear one all the time, and very smart it is too, judging from your pictures. Love the ears! Xxx

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