Evening all – well, it turns out that the intestines and guts that I found in the Top Field yesterday, were probably the result of some Shooting that had been going on. Nicedogwalkerlady and her husband were down the river today, and they said there had been two men in camouflage in the field yesterday. (Nicedogwalkerlady’s husband says he didn’t see them. Think about it.) Anyway, these men were Shooting, and it is reckoned all the intestines were the result of what they shot, as they gutted them on the way down the field. Not nice. Although it was for me. Various suggestions were proffered of what the unfortunate creatures could have been – the large intestine was far too big for pheasants/birds, but probably not Muntjac size, so we settled on Large Rabbits. It was an interesting conversation.
Have to say, those rabbits weren’t at their best – I was sick several times. Actually, I was probably only sick twice, but I don’t like waste and so it becomes a bit of a circle. My poor friend Ebony had also been in the Top Field yesterday and she had a very bad stomach in the early hours. I think she’d tried Rabbit entrails too. Do you know what, readers, She was in two minds whether to pop into the police station this morning, to let them know about the body parts in the field. She almost did! Thank goodness She thought better of it – can you imagine? How embarrassing. Her attention was diverted by Homeless Guy outside Sainsburys who told her all about his few days in hospital last week. He said the food was great. I don’t think that Greggs sausage roll can compete.
But listen, today has been a blast. Nice lie in, and a decent walk this morning. Loads of friends down there – including Teddy. Haven’t seen Teddy for a bit; he is a copper coloured Cockapoo and gets LOADS of attention whenever he’s down there. Unnecessary, if you ask me. All the Pack Leaders say, “Oh look it’s Teddy” when they see him, and make a Big Fuss. Teddy is far too Bouncy for my liking – he is young and energetic and sometimes like a thing possessed. She says things like “why can’t you run around like Teddy?” and actually ASKS Teddy to chase me, “to get some of the weight off.” Pot. Kettle. There was a mug outside the Homeless Man- by -the- River’s tent but I suspect whatever was in it is cold by now. I thought about cocking my leg against his tent ropes, but She bellowed at me. There seemed to be a huge number of Staffies down there today – I tend to adopt a very submissive position whenever one goes past.
So then it was time to cook Sunday lunch. I managed to steal some pieces of raw carrot, and was delighted to find She knocked up some Brownies. Being a very Messy cook, there is brown mixture all over the place by the time She finishes, and I even licked some off the washing machine door. Needed a tadge more vanilla, if you ask me, not that anyone does.
But Readers! The pies de resistance came this evening. I fooled everyone into thinking I was tired, so imagine their surprise when I went in the garden for a wee, and didn’t come back!! Yes! Managed to shove my way through the back fence in the pitch dark, and get into Large Man Over The Back’s garden. It was important that I did this today, being Sunday, as there had probably been Roast,and their bins were full. Not for long! I made light work of tipping them over, and dragging out as much as I could in the few minutes it took everyone to realise I’d escaped. He was very angry and shouted at me, and had to walk round the road to get me back. I didn’t care. I’ve eaten some lovely bits the last couple of days.
Been a bit noisy here this afternoon, with Lad and Young Lad arguing a lot about, ooh, well, everything really. She tried to help both of them with homework but I could sense She was becoming a teeny weeny bit frustrated when She shouted that She might have to pop back into town for a second time!
Well, it’s nearly time for something called Blue Planet, which involves lots of oohing and ahhing about the AMAZING colours and AMAZING photography and AMAZING creatures. Bores me rigid every week, so time for a snooze.
Tell your friends,
Bye for now,